2011

Everybody loves a brand new start. Everybody enjoys using the new year as a way to shake off old habits, but how many of you realized that each resolution you make, you break them faster than a teenage boy's premature ejaculation?

The new year is nothing short of an excuse (for me, at least) to get hammered as fuck (not like I don't already do so every weekend, I just need a more legit reason to binge guilt-free), it doesn't hold any more new promises than my future already does.

There is no fucking magic. So what if the calendar flips from a December to a January, from a 1st to a 31st, from a 2010 to a 2011, it's just another day that passes, another tick from the hands of a clock, another grain of sand from the time of life, it's just another day that the earth rotates, there is nothing special. Resolutions you make won't magically come true.

If I wanted to not procrastinate or change something about myself, I've learnt that it's best I do it the moment I think of it. Instead of waiting for a brand new start because it just makes me lazier pushing off tasks at hand.

2010 was a quick year. Zipping past faster than the last 19 years of life than I could catch. Like any other year, it was fraught with pain and joy. February I was a train wreck. I was in agony, recovering from my self-inflicted illness. March, I was briefly happy. June, I lost my heart. September, I remembered his lips. October, I was much better. December, love came back to me, alive this time. I won't say it's love actually, but it's been awfully amazing, and I don't remember being this happy in a long time.

This year I would hit the big 2. And I don't think I'm ready to be responsible yet. Not especially, for someone else's heart.